sth random FOR MYSELF

tomorrow will be the first day of prelim test...i have been waiting for this test for such a long time...because the a-level is not far away from us...i had been thinking a lot of possibilities about my future, yet these few months i suddenly stopped doing so, part of being overwhelmed with my revision, part of being losing sight of my goals...i have accustomed to the life consisiting of endless tests and reviews and analysis of mistakes and moving on and experiencing the new cycle again and again, so i feel a bit anxious by the fact that i am graduating. The life of univeristy is only one step away from me, and this exam will be the last performance for me before saying goodbye to the naive JC school life. i don't know what awaits me ahead, i don't know whether i can achieve what i want...too many uncertainties too many expectations too many works to do before going up on the stage, this is what my first ever musical competition told me. i just don't my to regret any decisions i am making or those i've made. GOGOGO...though i am not a super gifted child, i believe that there's part of reason for my existence in this world, i shall live up to the best with all my hard work.

REST IF U MUST, BUT NEVER STOP.

BELIEVING IN YOURSELF, YOU WILL BE SOMEBODY.

零度空间

"宁愿 孤独, 懒得再去想谁"

战神的怒吼,

战神的决绝,

让人颤栗,

无法靠近他的零度空间.

可是

谁能透过那层层盔甲,

看到那伤痕累累的灵魂;

谁能发现血腥的背后,

看到那重生的渴望

不愿将自己暴露,

因为无法相信这个缥缈的空间

只愿依赖自己塑造的寂寞世界

用狰狞

像野兽般

捍卫着

怕再次的伤痛

宁愿 孤独

也不愿将自己暴露

黑夜

残酷

是最好的保护

嘶吼

回音

却只给这绝望的黑色

带来无尽的苍凉

不愿回头

不带依恋

一如向前

并不是真的无所谓

只是枷锁越来越沉

令人已无法喘息

无法思索

沉重的步伐

每一步

已耗尽几乎所有

放下伤悲

在沉寂的夜

等待着新的重生

Leprechaun

from Irish Mythology

By nature, Leprechauns enjoy a state of solitude, and are said to be mischievous and ill-natured, with a mind of cunning. Accoring to legends, they are very rich, having many treasure crocks buried during war-time.

Trevor Manuel

Trevor Manuel

-The veteran whose advice will reshape the

global economic order

"Books have been written about how 27 years in jail prepared Nelson Mandela for reconciliation and not revenge. Well, prison bestowed similar pragmatism on Trevor Manuel-the Finance Ministor of South Africa." -TIME

Grown up under the apartheid racial-classification system, Manuel witnessed numerous cases in which people around him was easily differentiated and discriminated by the colour of skin. In the 1970s, he gravitated towards Steve Biko's black-consciousness movement (to"become a revolutionary with a big beardand a big gun")and then joined the African National Congress guerrilas in exile. After that, Manuel was incarcerated by the authorities for years until 1989, when he helped the ANC negociate as peaceful and to apartheid after regaining freedom.

As an elected Finance Minister, Trevor Manule has successfully led South Africa from bust to boom by adopting sound and efficacious policies. His capabilities and achievements have unwittingly made him as an indispensable catalyst in consolidating the public confidence in the local market Here is an interesting anecdote of him. When Manuel, 53, resigned on Sept 23 last year, the Johannesburg Stock Exchange fell 4% in minutes though the news of his departure was eventually proved to be rumors. When that was explained publicly, the markets recovered quickly.

In the global stage, Trevor Manuel is also an eminent figure and persuasive enough to win the ears of poweful leaders. The main point he has been trying to argue is that to truly resolve the crisis, every member involved has to give up somthing for the interest of the whole.

"May be that is not a bad message for the G20 meeings in London".

>.<

Books I read during Holidays in 2008

拾遗

题记：成长了，没有太多的喜悦，更多的是一份无言的的茫然。黑夜的彷徨里，我开始扣敲记忆的的窗门，想找回那个失落的自己。杜拉斯曾说，人一开始回忆就在慢慢变老。我不知道自己是否在慢慢变老，在这个黄金般的年龄，在还没有真正长大之前就慢慢变老。

童年

还来不及跟墙角的蛐蛐告别，墙已被夷为平地；还来不及跟玩伴们道声珍重，大家已经各奔东西；还不及跟童年告别，童年已经消失在那年夏天的转角处。现在回过头，过去的一切与现在仿佛隔着一层厚厚的膜，一切仿佛都在迷雾中，看不清，也看不透，空洞得令人无奈。日子就这么从匆茫茫地过去了，自己也不清楚，到底忽略了多少生命中重要的东西。想起麦田守望者里的稻草人，他守着无期的诺言，守着无尽的期望，守着一个永远没有结局的答案。童年亦或是如此吧？心中无时无刻都怀着对未来的期盼，并单纯地相信着内心最真挚的感动，然后，守候着时间的诺言。
初中三年
球场上挥洒的身影
扬起的尘土中夹杂着喘息
汗水在午后的阳光中熠熠生辉
校道上响起的脚步
未及定格的身影掠过窗台的海棠
教室内专注的脸庞
流畅的字迹在纸上倾泻
仿佛在与时间赛跑
微风轻抚几缕刘海
不留痕迹餐桌上狼吞虎咽
思绪早已飞回成山的作业
午夜的宿舍悄然无声
黑夜中木床上的那双眼睛
莫名地注视着迷惑的世界
想着学习，想着未来
想着不可知的人生
疲惫的身躯翻了个身
尔后融入这黑暗
一个个等待着明天
也期待着明天
――选自个人随笔2005

初中三年就这么过去了。这三年来，生活逐渐变得机械而麻木。但终日的忙碌反而令心灵觉得空虚。因为太忙，忙得都来不及停息，去回过头看看失落的风景线。一年一年，我发现自己开始迷失方向，也无端无故地喜欢上了黑夜。经常一个人在死寂一般的深夜里，出神地望着夜空，仿佛眼神中只有空洞的宇宙。虽然感到孤独，心里却享受着这种安静与无所事事的感觉。听着闹钟嘀嗒嘀嗒的声音，总不愿多做什么，只想坐着迎接下一夜的到来。或许这样能让我触摸到时间的脉搏，能辨别出它的脚步。在静谧的夜中，透过宇宙的瞳孔，跟随时间的年轮，在途中或许可以探访前生来世，更可能让自己找到心灵的归属，从此，空寂不再。但，“盲目的追寻仍然空空荡荡”，在了无睡意的夜晚，“一转身孤单已躺在身旁”。 那三年中，我和我的朋友们都在忙碌着，为了长大，为了将来，为了远方的呼唤。过得很累却都很迷茫，或许是因为还没等到想要的，所以我们仍在这无奈的漩涡里挣扎。有时低落的情绪让我几乎窒息，俯在课桌上，目光呆滞得像被抽去了灵魂。想尽情地吼叫出来，但看看旁边一个个漠然投身于书海中的同学，却又忍住了。他们的眼神也同样空洞，仿佛这世界除了他们自己以外不外乎空气。

故事还在继续

丘吉尔曾说：“这不是结束，这甚至不是结束的开始，但这毕竟是开始的结束”。


生活的车轮就这么继续着前进，谁也无法预料在到达下一个驿站时，上帝会送给自己怎样的礼物；谁也不知道，现在的幸福是否永远；谁也猜不透，现在的悲哀在生命中刻下了怎样的印痕。若人有永生，他的故事也将在另一个世界的历史长河中书写。放眼生命，一个故事的开始，是因为另一个故事的结束；最终这个故事也要结束，因为新的故事需要拉开帷幕。开幕，谢幕，生命就像一出出舞台戏，不断地有新的章节被演绎。笑过，哭过，闹过，累过……只要身临其境，不论在舞台上扮演的是主角还是配角，我们都让这出戏生动地在历史舞台上呈现。我们无法控制剧情的发展，唯有凭感觉和经验，揣摩我们该做的，该说的。 人们总记得书中仙杜麗拉美好的结局，但那不过是她与王子爱情旅程的另一个起点，另一个可以让人遐想的故事。同样的，我们也不能总只将眼光放在这一出正在上映的戏中，而也该想一想下一出戏可能会出现的情节以及我们的角色，做好一切心理准备，才不会被现实打个措手不及。 不论如何，我的故事仍在继续，不曾拥有真正的开始或结束。

后记

“这是一块会飞的石头。在阳光的照耀和细雨的滋润下，蛰伏心中的翅膀就会齐刷刷地生长出来，石头就会开始他自由的飞翔。”—毛云尔《会飞的石头》 离开了昔日的朋友，独身一人来到这热带国度，为的是一步步靠近一直坚信的梦想。生活的节奏往往快得让人就要窒息，却不敢有丝毫松懈。往日的欢笑仿佛在记忆中沉沦，而更多时候喜欢一个人看着天空发呆。一言一行，一颦一笑，霎那间成了梦里的花香，虽扑鼻却不再真实，但它确实又那么真实地存在过，在一瞬间定格，成为记忆的永恒。

life

Be YOURSELF. the way who you are, the way you define by yourself.

"When you take charge of your life, there is no longer need toask permission of other people or society at large. When youask permission, you give someone veto power over your life."
-- Geoffrey F. Abert